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Summary
Summary
As Featured in Entertainment Weekly
Easy solutions for life's toughest scenarios
When there's a 1 in 12 million chance of a shark attack occurring and a 1 in 5 chance of bed-bug infestation, it's easy to see which scenario is worth preparing for. What Do I Do If...' helps you solve the far more common, but no less devastating, of life's little curveballs. From accidentally dropping your ring down the drain to blowing out a tire at 65 mph to dealing with a friend who won't pay you back, each entry offers practical advice for fixing or getting out of just about any situation. With these handy instructions, you'll finally be able to breathe a sigh of relief when your boss comes onto you, your brakes fail, or you get trapped in an avalanche.
Filled with 120 valuable solutions to life's toughest problems, this book is there to save the day when you run into some bad luck and have no idea what to do next.
Author Notes
Eric Grzymkowski was born in 1984 in Fair Lawn, NJ. He spent his formative years mastering the Nintendo Entertainment System before discovering the Internet in 1995. Since then, he has devoted most of his free time to expanding his knowledge of all things useless and obscure.
Table of Contents
Introduction | p. 9 |
Chapter 1 Matters of Life and Death | p. 11 |
I've Been Kidnapped | p. 12 |
I'm Having a Heart Attack | p. 15 |
There's a Deadly Pandemic | p. 17 |
I'm Attacked by Killer Bees | p. 20 |
My Ship Is Sinking | p. 22 |
I Can't Find My Child | p. 25 |
A Volcano Is about to Erupt | p. 27 |
I'm Outside During a Flash Flood | p. 29 |
I'm Driving Into a Tornado | p. 31 |
A Hurricane Is on Its Way | p. 33 |
I'm Stuck in a Rip Current | p. 35 |
I'm Trapped in an Avalanche | p. 37 |
I'm Trapped on a Chairlift | p. 39 |
I Fall Through Ice | p. 41 |
I Drive Into Water | p. 43 |
I See Someone Drowning | p. 44 |
I Get Lost on a Day Hike | p. 46 |
I'm Being Robbed at Gunpoint | p. 48 |
I'm Choking | p. 50 |
I'm Caught in a Lightning Storm | p. 51 |
A Car Hits Me While I'm Walking | p. 53 |
I've Been Shot | p. 55 |
I've Been Bitten by a Snake | p. 57 |
The Power Goes Out in Winter | p. 59 |
My Tire Blows Out | p. 61 |
My Car Breaks Down in Winter | p. 63 |
I Wake Up to a Fire | p. 65 |
There's an Earthquake | p. 67 |
A Riot Erupts Around Me | p. 69 |
Chapter 2 Loss of Limb, Serious Injuries, and Not-So-Serious Injuries | p. 72 |
I've Been Stabbed | p. 73 |
I Think I've Been Drugged | p. 74 |
I've Stepped on a Nail | p. 77 |
I Cut Off My Finger | p. 79 |
I'm about to Have a Car Accident | p. 81 |
I'm Developing Frostbite | p. 82 |
I'm in a Bar Fight | p. 84 |
I Have a Nasty Sunburn | p. 86 |
I've Been Working in Poison Ivy | p. 88 |
I Get Jalapeño Oil in My Eyes | p. 90 |
I Hit My Head | p. 92 |
I Break My Nose | p. 94 |
I Break My Leg Hiking | p. 96 |
I Threw My Back Out | p. 98 |
I Get Doored on My Bike | p. 100 |
I Think I'm Being Followed | p. 101 |
I Am Stung by a Jellyfish | p. 103 |
I Have the World's Worst Hangover | p. 105 |
I Spill Hot Coffee on Myself | p. 106 |
I Cut Myself While Cooking | p. 108 |
I Encounter a Stray Dog | p. 110 |
I Get Food Poisoning | p. 112 |
Chapter 3 Expensive Mishaps You Wish Had Never Happened | p. 115 |
I'm Drowning in Credit Card Debt | p. 116 |
I Get Injured Without Health Insurance | p. 117 |
I Put a Hole Through My Wall | p. 120 |
My Landlord Raises the Rent | p. 122 |
There's Mold in My Bathroom | p. 124 |
I Am Caught Speeding | p. 126 |
I Get Into an Accident During a Test Drive | p. 128 |
My Home Is Vandalized | p. 130 |
I Struck a Deer with My Car | p. 133 |
My House Is Robbed | p. 135 |
I Lose My Cell Phone | p. 137 |
I Lose My Wallet | p. 139 |
A Tree Falls on My House | p. 141 |
My House Is Flooded | p. 143 |
I Drop My Wedding Ring Down the Drain | p. 146 |
My Identity Is Stolen | p. 148 |
I Lose My Job | p. 150 |
I Start a Grease Fire | p. 153 |
My Bike Is Stolen | p. 155 |
I Get My Smartphone Wet | p. 157 |
Chapter 4 Obnoxious Hassles and General Pains in the A** | p. 160 |
I Can't Sleep | p. 161 |
My Car Is Encased in Snow and Ice | p. 163 |
My Car Battery Died | p. 165 |
My Neighbor Won't Return Something | p. 167 |
My Hard Drive Failed | p. 169 |
I Move to a New City and Don't Know Anybody | p. 172 |
My Relative Is a Hoarder | p. 174 |
My Cats Don't Get Along | p. 176 |
I'm Lost in a Foreign Country | p. 178 |
There's a Mouse in My House | p. 180 |
My Houseguest Just Won't Leave | p. 183 |
I'm about to Miss a Flight | p. 185 |
My Tattoo Artist Screwed Up | p. 187 |
My Dog Ate Chocolate | p. 189 |
My Significant Other's Parents Hate Me | p. 191 |
I'm Trapped in an Elevator | p. 193 |
My Air Conditioner Fails in the Middle of Summer | p. 195 |
I Locked My Keys in My Car | p. 197 |
I Lost My Passport in a Foreign Country | p. 198 |
My Pet Goes Missing | p. 201 |
I Need to Break Into My House | p. 203 |
My Home Is Infested with Bed Bugs | p. 205 |
Chapter 5 Embarrassing Events That Make You Want to Crawl Under a Rock | p. 208 |
I Have Adult Acne | p. 209 |
My Period Strikes Suddenly | p. 211 |
My Sex Life Is Dead in the Water | p. 213 |
I Sexted the Wrong Person | p. 215 |
I Made a Drunken Fool of Myself | p. 217 |
I Forgot My Anniversary | p. 219 |
I Forgot What's-His-Face's Name | p. 220 |
I Have a One-Night Stand with My Coworker | p. 223 |
I Step in Dog Poop | p. 225 |
I Forgot My Wallet on a Date | p. 227 |
My Boss Comes On to Me | p. 229 |
I've Uncovered an Affair | p. 231 |
I Run Out of Toilet Paper | p. 233 |
My Child Is Throwing a Temper Tantrum | p. 235 |
I Have to Throw Up in Public | p. 237 |
My Children Catch Me Having Sex | p. 239 |
I Have Unexpected Guests and My House Is a Mess | p. 241 |
Something Gets Stuck "Up There" | p. 243 |
I Clicked a Not-Safe-for-Work Link at the Office | p. 245 |
I Clogged Someone Else's Toilet | p. 247 |
Index | p. 249 |