Prologue: Happy, Happy, Happy 1(6)
1 Low-Tech Man
7(14)
Rule No. 1 For Living Happy, Happy, Happy
Simplify Your Life (Throw Away Your Cell Phones and Computers, Yuppies)
2 Great Outdoors
21(16)
Rule No. 2 For living Happy, Happy, Happy
Don't Let Your Grandkids Grow Up to Be Nerds
3 Rise, Kill, and Eat
37(14)
Rule No. 3 For Living Happy, Happy, Happy
Learn to Cook (It's Better than Eating Slop)
4 Strange Creatures
51(14)
Rule No. 4 For Living Happy, Happy, Happy
Don't Try to Figure Out Women (They're Strange Creatures)
5 Who's a Man?
65(12)
Rule No. 5 For Living Happy, Happy, Happy
Always Wear Shoes (Your Feet Will Feel Better)
6 Honky-Tonk
77(14)
Rule No. 6 For Living Happy, Happy, Happy
Put the Bottle Down (You'll Thank Me in the Morning)
7 Sportsman's Paradise
91(16)
Rule No. 7 For Living Happy, Happy, Happy
Buy a House Near Water (It's a Lot More Fun)
8 Duck Commander
107(14)
Rule No. 8 For Living Happy, Happy, Happy
Never Sell Yourself Short (You Never Know, You Might Become a Millionaire)
9 Family Business
121(16)
Rule No. 9 For Living Happy, Happy, Happy
It's Cheaper to Hire Your Relatives (Unless You Don't Like 'Em)
10 If It Sounds Like a Duck
137(18)
Rule No. 10 For Living Happy, Happy, Happy
If You're Going to Do Something, Do It Right (Instead of Doing It Again)
11 Redneck Caviar
155(14)
Rule No. 11 For Living Happy, Happy, Happy
Suck the Head of a Crawfish (You'll Want to Do It Again and Again)
12 Prodigal Sons
169(20)
Rule No. 12 For Living Happy, Happy, Happy
Learn to Forgive (Life's a Lot Easier That Way)
13 River Rats
189(16)
Rule No. 13 For Living Happy, Happy, Happy
Share God's Word (It's What He Asks of You)
14 Founding Fathers
205(12)
Rule No. 14 For Living Happy, Happy, Happy
Read the Bible (We Can Still Save This Once Great Country--- It's Not Too Late)
Afterword: Letters from the Family 217