Get It On		1	(1)
A Little Bit About the Author		2	(10)
Kids These Days		12	(11)
Where Have All the Fellas Gone?		23	(9)
We've Built a Minimum-Wage Gilded Cage		32	(9)
Airport 2010		41	(14)
That's Entertainment?		55	(24)
Motherfucking Nature		79	(12)
Bathroom Doos and Don'ts		91	(9)
Women, Hear Me Roar		100	(16)
A Message to the Fat Cats in Washington		116	(28)
God, Religious Tolerance, and Other Shit That Doesn't Exist		144	(7)
Foods I Have a Beef With		151	(21)
This Chapter Is Not a Hate Crime		172	(11)
I Want My Future Back		183	(24)
Do Yourself a Favor		207	(24)
Time to Call It a Life		231	(14)
Conclusion		245	(2)
Acknowledgments		247