Together : the healing power of human connection in a sometimes lonely world

Title:

Author:

Murthy, Vivek Hallegere, 1977- author.

Personal Author:

Murthy, Vivek Hallegere, 1977- author.

ISBN:

9780062913296

Edition:

First edition.

Physical Description:

xxii, 326 pages ; 24 cm

Contents:

Section I. Making sense of loneliness -- Under our noses -- The evolution of loneliness -- Cultures of connection -- Why now? -- Unmasking loneliness -- Section II. Building a more connected life -- Relating inside out -- Circles of connection -- A family of families.

Abstract:

"In Together, the former Surgeon General addresses the overlooked epidemic of loneliness as the underpinning to the current crisis in mental wellness and offers solutions to create connection and stresses the importance of community to counteract the forces driving us to depression and isolation"-- Provided by publisher.

Subject Term:

Loneliness.

Mental health.

Communities.

Summary:

Holds:

Available:*

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Summary

Instant New York Times Bestseller!

The book we need NOW to avoid a social recession, Murthy's prescient message is about the importance of human connection, the hidden impact of loneliness on our health, and the social power of community.

Humans are social creatures: In this simple and obvious fact lies both the problem and the solution to the current crisis of loneliness. In his groundbreaking book, the 19th surgeon general of the United States Dr. Vivek Murthy makes a case for loneliness as a public health concern: a root cause and contributor to many of the epidemics sweeping the world today from alcohol and drug addiction to violence to depression and anxiety. Loneliness, he argues, is affecting not only our health, but also how our children experience school, how we perform in the workplace, and the sense of division and polarization in our society.

But, at the center of our loneliness is our innate desire to connect. We have evolved to participate in community, to forge lasting bonds with others, to help one another, and to share life experiences. We are, simply, better together.

The lessons in Together have immediate relevance and application. These four key strategies will help us not only to weather this crisis, but also to heal our social world far into the future.

Spend time each day with those you love. Devote at least 15 minutes each day to connecting with those you most care about. Focus on each other. Forget about multitasking and give the other person the gift of your full attention, making eye contact, if possible, and genuinely listening. Embrace solitude. The first step toward building stronger connections with others is to build a stronger connection with oneself. Meditation, prayer, art, music, and time spent outdoors can all be sources of solitary comfort and joy. Help and be helped. Service is a form of human connection that reminds us of our value and purpose in life. Checking on a neighbor, seeking advice, even just offering a smile to a stranger six feet away, all can make us stronger.

During Murthy's tenure as Surgeon General and during the research for Together, he found that there were few issues that elicited as much enthusiastic interest from both very conservative and very liberal members of Congress, from young and old people, or from urban and rural residents alike. Loneliness was something so many people have known themselves or have seen in the people around them. In the book, Murthy also shares his own deeply personal experiences with the subject--from struggling with loneliness in school, to the devastating loss of his uncle who succumbed to his own loneliness, as well as the important example of community and connection that his parents modeled. Simply, it's a universal condition that affects all of us directly or through the people we love--now more than ever.

Reviews (1)

Kirkus Review

The former surgeon general examines the health crises brought on by a more overarching plague: loneliness. "For more than a century," writes Murthy, "the physicians holding this office [the surgeon general's] have addressed national health crises ranging from yellow fever and influenza outbreaks to the aftermath of hurricanes and tornados to the terrorist attacks on 9/11." The epidemic he was called on to address took more insidious forms: eating disorders, depression, opioid and other chemical addiction, and suicide. All have in common a source in social dislocation--but not isolation, since being able to be alone can be a healthy thing--that in turn produces loneliness, the inability to summon human contact when human contact is wanted, even if one is in a room full of people. These days, the author writes, Americans aren't good at being with others, and it doesn't help that social media thrives on our loneliness, for which we turn to a world of virtual others for succor. Murthy's approach is anecdotal, sometimes annoyingly so: Not every observation needs an "I was Joe's anomie" story to back it, which blunts rather than sharpens the message. Still, the numbers are meaningful. As the author observes, there are more lonely or socially isolated people in America today than there are smokers, smoking having been a health problem that medicine and society banded together to do something about, never mind the tobacco lobbyists. Loneliness is more difficult to spot than a curl of smoke, and for that, Murthy offers some useful prescriptions, including teaching people "self-compassion," which "is what shields us from--or at least softens the blow of--the judgment and ridicule of people who don't understand us." Other measures for young people, who bear much of the weight of the epidemic, include setting aside more family time and encouraging offline as well as online play. A touch too pat at times but, overall, a well-considered diagnosis of a real and overlooked crisis in public health. Copyright (c) Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.